Of Bitches, Bimbos and Bastards.

Classic old-school eeda vent coming up. Haven't done this ina while, felt this young and stupid afterwards, or this liberated. Im glad i did it.
Please feel free to skip thru it, it's for my own memories :)
.........

Now let me tell you something.
It's not always the Nice Guys who get it worst, its the Nice Girls too;
difference, they finish last, but we
kick Butt in the end.
and Asses, and Rear-hinds, and Derrieres, and other such Extremities. 


and we kick it Well.

 Scenario 1- Nice Girl aka me tries to be friends with Bitch 1, aka you. You tell me how glad you are, and if you can hang out with me, because you know no one. You then get into the Crowd. You make me wait an hour and half while ordering me around school to 4 different locations before finally telling me you didn't have time to meet me and switching your phone off, thus living upto your title in all aptness. YOUR the bitch honey,your pretty Forever 21 jacket and the H and M shoes is buying your ticket in with those fucking jackasses, but its not buying you any friends.

Scenario 2- Bitch 2. I gave you a place to stay at 4 am, when noone else did, and at 2 am, and at 1 am. I let you sleep in my bed. I gave you my clothes which you haven't returned, you still continue to parade in and pose in because they're 2 sizes too small on you thus making you look sexy (aka overwhelming exhibition of the boobage) so you can take pictures and put them up on facebook. I cooked breakfast and dinner for you, made you tea, let you make a mess of my bathroom. You put me at the end of the show you were in charge iof, despite popular opinion, you kicked me out of the dance team and refused to let me join, you persistently ignore me and pretend im the scum of the earth unless one of your ''buddies'' gives me attention. I still called to congratulate you on the wedding. But hey, YOUR the bitch honey, you sleep at other guy's houses routinely and lie to your parents despite being fucking engaged, and by now married, you flirt disgustingly with your boy-toy, and pretend youre the shit. Youre right, you are THE shit. Literally.I REALLY hope someone shows your fiance the semi-porn pictures of you sitting in your 'bacha's' lap.

Scenario 3. Bitch 3. you, like bitch 1, wanted someone to hang out with when you knew no one. now ur in the Crowd. Jeans have turned to non existent tights, sweaters to mini dresses, shyness to party-animal hysteria. Bitch by assoication. Sorry.

Scenario 4. I gave you my jewellary to wear because you didnt have any, helped with your make-up, put nailpolish on your toes because you're one of those lucky brown bimbos who, its a surprise, knows how to breathe without someone strapping a fucking oxygen mask on your face, taught you how to walk the walk because you wanted to be part of the show without ever turning up to practise, to which you said, 'i owe you my life'. You, Bitch looked me dead in the eye, and pretended you had never seen my face before. Which in retrospect is alright,i forgot you don't have a brain, yes, cuz ur the Bimbo. Bitch starts with a B too btw, call yourelf blessed you're both.

Scenario 5. You are the Bastard. You're cool with me as long as everyone else is cool, you're not when no one else is. You pretend to be the Nice Guy but let's face it, you're after them because those pitiful creatures add substance to your miserably petty life, and you enjoy it. You'd kiss the shit that comes out of their buttholes if you could, and smile through your teeth thru it.

Scenario 6. You, You, You and You are trying. Except You're confused because you dont know why you're friends are this way with me, so you drag me in and then think better of it, and then leave me hanging.

You do what he does, or smile, thats the full extent of your God-given abilities.

You are are like You, that, and the fact You are too consumed with indian threesomes to notice me, and im the Family Friend from the past so you cant share the explicit details with me either.

But none of You have the fucking balls, despite being male, to take a stand and realize what petty mediocrity You willingly submerge Yourself in. Lack of testicles combining with lack of say, a heart and a brain makes for Shitty people.
End Story.


But you know what, at the end of the day, Im still better off.

The shallow Bitches are gonna realize no one but the Shallow Bastards wanna marry them. Theyll have the shallow babies and continue to feed idiocy into the human race, and have no cause for achievement except for probably being the most insignificant creatures on the planet.
The shallow Bastards are gonna look for Nice Girls to marry, so they can come home to cooked meals and a clean house. Guess what, Nice Girls learn from experience, you're not getting none. So they'll marry the Bitches and the above story will repeat.



I'm a Nice Girl, modesty in check. I played no hardball with any of you. I didn't resort to stripping down to practically my underwear to impress the Crowd and get in.I didn't resort to salivating at your feet to let myself in either. I did fucking give you respect, my time of day, forgiveness and a second, third, fourth chance but fuck it. Im a nice Girl but im not a Stupid Girl. I want to make good memories but anything with You will be beneath me.

And no, I'm not stuck up. Im proud of things you don't have. Like a functioning brain. Lik my certain naivete at times yes but almost for sure the maturity you all seem to lack. I refuse to partake in the mindgames the bitchfests the drama and the bullshit and the utter highschool-ish mindset you follow. That is Not me.

And if i think, that for a second the answer to my loneliness is to seek company and compassion from You fucking lot, then it is my weakness. I will Not let myself give in.

I wont. I'm learning by numbers and degrees, by repeated experiences and being let-down to realize, the world's a Bitch, despite my persistent belief in humanity. I need to start over, and find someone worth hanging out with, or find solace in being alone.







I realize this post makes me sound horribly whiny and omg-i-dont-have-any-friendssssssssssss, and omggggg-im-soooooooo-aloneeeeeeeee...
But its not like that.
The last couple of months have made me realize that there actually ARE people who are two-faced,hypocrites,self-serving,opportunistic; Bitches in every sense of the word.
I've realized that no matter what happens, I dont need to resort to becoming them, or making them happy, to have their company so that I can too can have some good college memories.

Maybe college is not about having a funtime and making friends.. Maybe it's about making the Right kind of friends, the kind who won't stab you in the back and in the ass for added benefit when ur not looking. Yeah it is about the partying, but i've been there done that, and its no fun when the people you're with have such severe fucked up personality issues.
Maybe i'm too uptight. Maybe i'm too mature. Maybe i grew up before they did, and they will never understand. Maybe.

Just push thru it, stay clear of Assholes, keep going and not let the loneliness consume me into its depths.
Yeaaaaaap.

For anyone reading who went to college in the Great North America, how was your college experience like?
Id really like to know. And if you too know people like those mentioned, maybe we should carve them a brand new Asshole in recognition of their efforts for being just that, and nothing more.
What say?
-eeda

i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak
i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak
i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak.
i.must.think.before.i.speak.


some simple lessons
have to be learnt the good ol' way.


the tango scene in Scent of a Woman is immaculate.
i stand corrected- the Entire movie is immaculate.

Que sera, sera

Whatever will be, will be.
friggin need to stop worrying the shiate out of every darn thing..

that sounds alot like fatalism. if i am meant to pass the exam, ill pass the exam. who the hell needs to study for it?
with that being said, let's just go to sleep listening to corny songs from the 90's.
it's too hot to study.

Moondance.

just cuz.

[20/07/2008 10:37:25 PM] eeda says: the song?
[20/07/2008 10:38:43 PM] drug* says: for youuuuu
[20/07/2008 10:38:52 PM] eeda says: aaaaaaaaaaaahahaha..
[20/07/2008 10:38:56 PM] eeda says: cupcakeness.

*name changed. no just kidding, his name's cocaine.
LAMEness.

Well, its a marvelous night for a moondance
With the stars up above in your eyes
A fantabulous night to make romance
neath the cover of October skies
-Moondance, By Michael Buble.

Yeh.good times.


i will dance through my days to ballets of pink sunrises and to ballads of clandestine sunsets.

jeez. gettin all poetsy arent we?


me- 'sometimes i feel like i don't grow older by a single year, more like 5 for every 1.'
sabs- 'slow down slow down slow down. let the rest of us catch up.'

yeah.

i don't want to come in the middle. i need just 10% of you ,she can have the rest.
bartering friendships.
tough.
u can't run away from drama can u.

i miss ignorance.

and i stare pointlessly out the train windows and the smoke rising from the factories across the river reminds me of white curly hair coming out of old men's ears.
the kind of old men whose hair looks like floating candy floss.

our relationship has ceased to exist past the are you eating well?sleeping well?
i tack on the quiet miss u's quickly before the click of the dialtone. almost like a cracked ornament. almost like im disgusted to admit the weakness.
three little words.
three little re affirmatives of something much more fierce inside.

I Missed You.

sumtimes i feel like a gushing water hose held tightly at the mouth.
eeeeeeeemmmmmmmmmmmoooooooo.

if it helps , the above was meant in a strictly platonic way to members of family.

i want to see your hands with
my fingertips.
trace out
your palms like a
fragile, torn
map.
i want to
tiptoe across your
intricate woven paths and
find an
eternal perdition
in your
fist.

don't ask me where that came from. on the spot little thumbelina inspired thing.
blah.

time to sleep.
-eeda

Lesson learnt.

He was my North, my South, my East, my West.
My working week and my Sunday rest.
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song.
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong.

- W.H Auden.

Resolution.

Things to do today #1.

I ......won't worry my life away...

-The Remedy, Jason Mraz.

-thus spake,
eeda.

For want of a nail..

this, to acknowledge i need patience, i need to learn to still the tempest..
following are some chosen lines from one of my all time favorite poem...







-cheers,
eeda.